Dear Paula,
I see that things have gotten better for you since I last wrote to you. See? Everything was a strike to the heart at that time, but now it's a good memory that you can smile on. Now it's time to focus on yourself and do great things.
I've noticed things are rough at home. Just remember to breathe after all the yelling and screaming. If that's not very helpful, just daydream about things that make you happy like you always do. After that, you'll be fine. Make sure to calm your thoughts and try not to get too harsh with them. You're just caught in the moment and it'll all be fine afterwards. You've been dealing with him especially for your entire life. Be patient with him and don't let his ignorance get to you. He sees with his mouth, not his eyes.
I know you hate it there. Just ... Be patient. Yeah, I know, it's not something you want to hear, but you really need the patience. Because after college, you're flying out to live all by yourself,
where nobody can poke at you and make you hate yourself. You need a new surrounding, new air, and you'll get that soon. Just hang in there.
I see you've gotten close to some friends. It's good to see that these people matter to you and make you happy. You've been smiling at Jane Doe especially. Just remember to chill 'cause you're already freaking him out. Don't get too excited, keep your cool, and I wish both of you two a great friendship together.
I wanted to mention to you how dead you are during the day and how alive you are at night. Use that time to meditate and maybe get back to your hobbies. When he broke up with you, you abandoned yourself along with your hobbies. Pick up a composition notebook again and write down that story or maybe draw some of your fandoms again. You're being lazy and you just left these broken pieces on the floor. Pick them back up, damn you! That's why you're so dead during the day. Jesus.
Make tomorrow different. Actually get out if bed when you wake up instead of staying there for another 3 hours until the afternoon until it's time to go do important things. Go jogging during the sunset or maybe the morning. Eat healthy. Visit Nya- Nya and play with him 'cause I know you miss him a lot. Making time to visit your kitten isn't entirely enough, but it's something. Go watch the sunset with your friends and have dinner after. Go to the liberation parade and visit the carnival with friends. Sell all your shit you've been meaning to sell. Stop being so dead during the day, change up your life, and live! You're complaining, but the only thing stopping you is you. Before, all this lying around was because you were moping over that break up and that was okay at that time. Now, you've gotten so comfortable with lying around that now it's just laziness. Pick up the pieces and let's go on that adventure! It's time to be truly be happy again 'cause you deserve better than just being dead during the day.
Make sure to focus on yourself and what's best for you. If people can't handle some parts of you, stop wasting your time to make them like you. You can't make the entire world happy, so the least you can do is flip your hair at them and keep skipping ahead. If they don't like what they see, you can't help it to be you. If you aren't hurting anyone in any way, you're doing just fine and that's when you see that they're the problem, not you.
Glad to see you're back on your feet. Now all you need to do is start walking forward instead of walking in circles. You're never going to find anything new in that path. If you do that, life will be fun again.
I wish you well and good luck with everything.
Yours truly,
Peaches
